Of Church Signs and Breaking Legs

I’m currently working on the final stages in the release process on two books, one of which is titled Megabelt (the other is Christian Archy by David Alan Black, but it doesn’t feature in this post), and is a fictional account of life in the Bible belt.  The lead character, Gil,  doesn’t much like the sayings on church signs:

Gil was going to find the church marquee guy one day and break his legs so he could never make the trip to the top of the ladder ever again.

I was driving home from buying groceries yesterday and encountered a church sign.  It annoyed me so much that I turned around and used my cell phone to take a picture of it.  When I turned around, however, I discovered that the other side of the sign had an equally annoying saying.

Here’s the front:

Now while there is a certain amount of truth here–faith without works is dead–I really don’t think any amount of faith will get me into heaven.  In fact, I’m not sure it’s faith that gets me to church.

So here’s the second side:

Sorry that I didn’t do too good a job getting the pictures.  It looks like the lens was dirty.  What bugs me about this side is the idea that getting to heaven is based on getting your facts right.  I call this “salvation by correct theology,” and I think it’s just a species of salvation by works.

OK, have fun.  I’m sure there are some readers out there who will find something good about these signs.  Personally, I’m with Gil.