The Separation and Grief of God
Last night my wife Jody and I recorded a conversation about grief for the Energion Publications Tuesday Night Hangout. Those who are calendar-aware, so to speak, might notice that it was on a Wednesday night. We had a technical issue, so the conversation was delayed. It was an interesting conversation, and, if I do say so myself, I think quite enlightening and helpful.
In preparation for this event, I was thinking about grief in scripture. Now I’m not one to imagine that I will find an outline of the “right” way to do grieving somewhere in scripture. In fact, there are many stories of grief, expressions of grief, and reactions to it tucked away in the various stories. Paul, who isn’t sure whether it’s best to go on to glory now or to stay with his people, so sure of he was heaven (Philippians 1:21-26), is nonetheless also distressed at the illness of Epaphroditus and the sorrow he would feel should Epaphroditus not recover (Philippians 2:25-30).
As I was thinking, however, the one example of grieving that I find in the scripture is not human, but divine. For what is the story of our faith and our salvation if it is not a story of God grieving for the separation from his creation, and the efforts God makes to heal the rift? Many Christians seem to feel that attributing such an emotion to God is a bit irreverent. It’s bringing God down to our level. We’re comfortable with anger (though “wrath” sounds more theologically proper), we’re somewhat comfortable with “love,” as it is used so many times, though we try to distinguish divine love from its human shadows. But grieving? This seems somewhat odd.
The Bible does not shy away from speaking of God in this way, as it speaks of God changing his mind and being grieved (KJV-more like provoked!) at what people do. God is not emotionless in the stories of scripture. And surely the most important story, the longest one, the one that ties our theology together is a story of grief, of seeking, and finally of redemption and reunion. God walks in the garden which God has made for the first couple, but then separation occurs and things go very sour.
God crosses the gap in the incarnation and becomes one of us. Jesus showed sorrow many times. John 11:35, the famous “shortest verse in the Bible,” says that Jesus wept. There has been much controversy regarding what Jesus was crying about. If he was about to raise Lazarus from the dead, which he does in the next few verses, why is he crying? I wonder if we might miss an obvious explanation. One can weep because of the sorrow of those who are hurt. Jesus knows what he is about to do, but nobody else does. He shares in their sorrow as one of them.
Comparing our grief with God’s separation from his creation makes the process long, but it also puts the same hope of reunion before us. God knows it’s coming, and we can too. But in the meantime, there is separation and there is sorrow. Not sorrow without hope. Not depressing, life-destroying sorrow. But real sorrow.
We don’t have to pretend that death is really a good thing, or that we are totally happy that we are missing our loved ones. But we also can look forward to the time when death is no more. Death isn’t good. Death will be defeated (Hebrews 2:14-15).
